We can Build you Better than you were Before. We have the Tools, we have the Technology. 

  We have the Tools and Technology

Return to  GoArmy Home

The ArmyBugs represent the bleeding edge in modern Guerilla Multimedia Warfare. The mutant forces of the ArmyBugs combine the latest genetic enhancements along with state of the art bio mechanical armor, cybernetic implants, high capacity super soakers, laser tag, multi spectrum lighting arrays and tactical image targeting systems. Deployed with the elite hotties of the FireBug Corps, the ArmyBugs instantly attract attention and have maximum visual impact on all civilians. 

Alpha Testing Program é
Nobody gets to use this stuff before you do. The ArmyBugs are the very first to deploy the latest technology in the field. You get first hand experience perfecting and testing the most mind blowing technology years before it's deemed safe for public use. Is that cool or what? And if you tell anybody about it we'll have to kill you. But that's cool. Your experience will help make the galaxy a better and more profitable place for us all.

Bio Mechanical Technology é
Bio Mechanical Technology
BioMech. Living technology. All ArmyBugs in the field are fitted will the latest BioMech Armor. These systems have the latest graphical user interfaces and integrate seamlessly with the cybernetic implants, processors, sensors and weapons systems and are upgradeable in the field with minimum downtime  and preserve investment in legacy systems and infrastructure. The latest generation of BioMech Armor has been enhanced with Chameleon and Firefly DNA to enable deep cover penetration of the rave scene. A Paisley Parsing Program and UV indexer fractalize audio input to allow realtime DayGlo Paisley pattern generation.

Cybernetic Implants é
Cybernetic Implants
Given today's labor market and high quality applicants we recognize that we need to upgrade the infrastructure and processing systems for maximum productivity. Cybernetic implants directly interface to standard neural networks and enable direct hardware interfaces to the system bus.  Users can now connect  directly to the galaxy wide web or military network as needed. After service is completed the implants can be left in for direct connection to retail POS systems giving you more advantage in the service sector. Custom processor modules are also available for most civilian specialties.    

Genetic Enhancements é
Genetic Enhancements
Face it. With the unregulated experiments of the early 21st century,  the right to life movement, and the dominance of Camp Skynyrd it's a genetic cesspool out there. We carefully screen all applicants (and if necessary sterilize them) for recessive genetic anomalies. After mapping any recessive genes they are carefully excised and replaced with new enhanced genes that make you faster, stronger, smarter and better looking than you were before.

Processors é
Latest Mutel Obtanium Processor
Featuring the latest Mutel Obtanium processors the ArmyBugs have the fastest clock rate available. Even totally brain dead soldiers are able to operate almost normally with minimal assistance. And after service you can easily be reprogrammed to fit into many civilian service jobs. Even if you're a little slow on the uptake there is hope for you. And our special emotional processors eliminate those nasty bad feelings you can get when you have to follow orders.

Sensors é
LED Sensors
The ArmyBugs are also fitted with the very latest ultrabrite LED arrays or spudlamps. Civilians  will see you coming from miles away and will quickly scurry away to avoid being blinded by the multi spectral dazzling emissions put out by these powerful sensors. Enemy troops will also be quickly assimilated by the power of the force.

Tactical Image Targeting Systems é
Tactical Image Targeting Systems
These state of the art systems enable the  ArmyBugs to immediately respond to incoming missiles or insults and launch a devastating promotional counterattack. Our studies have shown that most enemy soldiers simply stare in disbelief and are easily overwhelmed and subdued and rarely is a shot even fired. When the elite hotties of the Insecto FireBugs are put into the field enemy troops will line up begging to be assimilated. No other service offers even a remotely similar functionality. The FireBugs are truly the state of the art in modern guerilla multimedia warfare.

Visual Services é
Visual ServicesThe ArmyBugs offer the very latest, state of the art visual services. Our promotional campaigns arrive in the field with stunning visual and fire displays that instantly bring traffic and civilians to a complete standstill and attract maximum attention and media frenzies. Even the most jaded reporter will respond positively to help spread the word. Even though an Insecto invasion may appear to be a big budget Hollywood special effects extravaganza the ArmyBugs are all too real. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.

Weaponry é
High Tech WeaponryHigh capacity SuperSoakers, bullhorns, blinding LED arrays, and light sabers are all part of the standard multimedia weapons package that soldiers take into the field. Even though these are non-lethal weapons they are completely devastating to enemy reporters. Due to the highly effective antics of the Insecto FireBugs it is rare that a shot is ever fired in anger.